Addiction To Vodka
by Queen-Of-Sins
Summary: Malex. "She was like vodka. She dulled your senses, made your reactions a lot slower, made you say things you never thought you would and she was mildly addictive."


**This was written for some friends, there are 6 very short drabbles and they each gave me some words. You will see what the words are, as you read, so I won't tell you them now. It's Marissa and Alex, although I am thinking of doing a Ryan and Taylor one soon. I wrote the first part in second person because it fit better that way. Plus at the end you will, hopefully, see why I did it.**

_**Vodka. **_

She was like vodka. She dulled your senses, made your reactions a lot slower, made you say things you never thought you would and she was mildly addictive. Afterall, one taste and you think you can handle more; but really you fall down and out. She wasn't like all the other metaphorical drinks, she was clear and simple if a little bitter and she left a burning sensation in your chest. You chose her out of all the other drinks you could have had, rum and coke, beer or something soft. No, you wanted the one that got to you right away and hit the spot. She looks pure from the outside, just like clear vodka, so simple and see-through. But underneath her delicate exterior she's almost deadly and when misused; lethal.

It's quite ironic really, her little silver hip-flask is always filled with some type of alcoholic drink and she favors vodka too. She is with her friends at the moment and you are wiping down the bar, the cloth wrapped tightly around your thin hand and your eyes fixed on her back. You want to quench your thirst because ever since you laid eyes on her you feel like you have been dehydrated for years, starved from something only she could give you and the very thought that you can't have it drives you to almost despair. See, she is like vodka, to an alcoholic who fuels herself on the very desire that is the woman in the white halter top, you need her.

She's walking over now and you smirk, ignoring the perverted comments from some guy who couldn't handle you or his drink. She smiles at you but returning it would be stepping into territory you have forced yourself to stay away from.

"Don't you think you have had enough to drink?" She knows you are only joking and she shrugs. "Okay, what can I get you?" Your mind wanders and your eyes give you away as they drift to her lips, you quickly pull them back to her whole face but you're sure she's caught you.

"Vodka and Coke." You nod, almost smiling at the symbolic shit, as you make the drink and hand it to her. There's an unreadable expression on her face and that melodramatic nonsense of comparing her to vodka comes back as you feel a burning path working its way through your chest as you look at her.

"You should stop drinking it could become very addictive. Though it does wonders for my club." Her eyes meet yours but this time you hold your stance, afterall you have a very thick head and you can hold your drink well.

"It's only addictive if I can't get enough of it." She's walking away now after flashing you a smile. You take a step back and analyze your situation. Yeah, you're addicted.

_**Burn.**_

Marissa lay on her bed, her face scrunched up in thought and her white teeth chewing on her bottom lip making it blood red. Her best friend lay on her stomach at the foot of her bed flipping through some pages of a magazine, stopping occasionally to look at new fashion or to comment on some celebrities' hair. Letting out a large sigh Marissa slammed her hands on either side of her making Summer jump and stare at her.

"Okay, apart from the obvious. What's wrong?" Summer sat up and crossed her legs staring at her friend half-annoyed at the rude awakening she had from her daydream and half-worried about Marissa's recent strange behavior.

"I don't know. That's the problem." She sighed. Summer seemed to contemplate something for a second before hitting Marissa lightly on her thigh.

"Is it Ryan? Cause if it is then I am in the same boat. His little bobble-headed geek of an adopted brother is driving me crazy." Upon seeing the strange look she was getting from Marissa she stopped flailing her arms and quickly smiled sympathetically. "But, this is your issue. So tell me Coop, what's on your mind?"

"Alex." Marissa fiddled with the blankets, then her jeans, her nails and finally she drifted her eyes up to her best friend, who seemed completely confused. "Yeah, I know."

"Girl Alex?" Summer raised an eyebrow as Marissa nodded. "Bait Shop Alex?" Another nod and a blush made Summer press just a little further. "Purple streak Alex?" A small smile grew on Marissa's face and Summer had her answer. "You like her?"

"I don't know. Yes?" Marissa looked down again. "It's just everytime I'm around her I feel, happier. And, I'm not saying I'm not happy with you guys, I just feel different. Like you do with Seth or Zach, whoever is on your agenda." That earned her a death glare, she didn't see it but she knew her friend too well. "It's confusing the hell out of me because she's a girl. When she touches me it's like a burning sensation, but it's a good one, and when she whispers something to me I get this rush and it's like a hot path right to my heart." She looked back at Summer who was totally engrossed in her little story.

"Wow, I suffer from rage-blackouts and you suffer from lesbianism. We're a good team, huh?" She laughed quietly but Marissa didn't make a noise, she didn't even try and throw something at her. "Maybe you should talk to her and see how she feels."

"I can't. What if she dosen't feel the same way." Summer shrugged and put her hands on her friend's arms as a comforting release.

"You can't burn something without starting a fire, can you?" Quite happy with her little wisdom and proof she was listening she sat back and let Marissa take in her words.

_**Sunshine.**_

Alex smiled. This was why she had bought a Jeep, it was warm and the breeze from having the top down was making her feel more alive than she had in days. She was driving along the coast, back to her little apartment and singing along to some song that was playing just a little too loud out of her radio. She saw a woman walking on the sidewalk and grinned, pulling up to the side and slowing down just behind her. The woman turned around and smiled at her. Alex warmed, Marissa's smile always did that to her. She turned down the volume

"Where are you going, sunshine?" Marissa laughed at Alex's comment and hid her blush well by looking down at the floor.

"Anywhere that's in the general direction of leading me away from home." Alex nodded, knowing how much she hated her mother and the idea of having to spend time with her step-father.

"Come to mine then. I'm bored anyway and if you don't come I'll be forced to clean." She tapped on her steering wheel and waited for the answer. Finally she heard the passenger door slam shut and she smiled at her co-rider.

"Sunshine?" Marissa buckled her belt and raised an eyebrow. Alex shrugged and pulled back out onto the road again.

"I'm in a very rare and a very good mood. I won't call it you again." She missed the look Marissa shot at her and continued to drive. "Plus, I sounded like a dirty old man and that wasn't the look I was going for today." She grinned at Marissa before flicking the radio back on.

_**Music.**_

"So, what is your favourite thing about music?" Alex looked up from her ice-cream and shrugged before scooping some more into her mouth. Marissa had spent the night at hers and took it into her own personal will to rifle through all of Alex's things and check out her music collection. And it was a big collection. It was early in the morning and the two couldn't sleep, so as Alex sat on the floor, Marissa hung upside down from the couch and continued to ask questions to learn more about her friend.

"The lyrics. They can mean absolutely nothing sometimes but they can still touch you and other times you just hear a song and it just relates to you and some situation you're in." She put her bowl down and faced Marissa, quirking her eyebrow. "Your face has gone red." The brunette quickly sat up and ran her fingers through her hair to get it somewhat presentable.

"I like lyrics too." She lay down on the couch and Alex noted she moved a lot. That would get tiresome in bed, unless she was awake and they were doing something that involved a lot of energy. She slapped herself, hard, inwardly for thinking such things and passed it off as teenage hormones. "Like in songs, where you want to be with someone but you can't and the words just kind of flow and force you to think, even if you don't want to, but you always end up smiling because you're thinking of that person." She pulled a little face. "That made no sense."

"It did. A lot of songs get me thinking like that." Alex looked at the clock and wondered how the hell she was still awake at this time when she had woken at 6 the previous morning.

"Make you think of the person you can't be with?" Marissa's ocean eyes watched Alex nod. "Do I know her?" Alex nodded again. Honesty was the best policy and she wasn't really thinking straight, she just knew she couldn't lie to Marissa. Not even to protect her. "How do you know she dosen't want you?"

"She's straight."

_**Temptation.**_

It had been two weeks since Alex had seen Marissa. Work had been hectic and she had been up to LA and sorted things out with Jodie. That had been strange but she was Alex, she got through it. Now, though, here she was facing a very excited brunette girl who was talking at an alarming rate of missing her and not having to be worried anymore. The blonde put her hands on the thin arms of her friend and ignored the crackling electricity that sparked between them, she hated sexual tension.

"Calm down. Breath. Come inside." Marissa nodded and literally bounded into Alex's small apartment. The blonde smiled at having being missed so much but felt a stab of guilt at what she had done back in LA. Not that it mattered, right?

"So, how was LA?" She was on her couch, again, and Alex wondered if she would actually sit anywhere else. "Did you have fun?" She flicked her eyes up and Alex fought against herself not to meet them.

"It was fine." Sitting on the arm of the couch. "Met up with Jodie and sorted some things out." If she didn't convince herself otherwise she was bewildered at the flash of jealousy that crossed Marissa's eyes.

"Oh. Is she okay?" Alex nodded and the two fell into a silence that was both deafening and awkward. A minute passed and then another and finally Marissa broke the tension. "Did you sleep with her?" The look on Alex's face gave it away but she still waited patiently for an answer, hoping beyond anything that Alex would try and cover it up or lie because she wasn't sure she wanted to hear it.

"It just, kind of, happened. First we were talking, then kissing and then the next thing I know I'm naked in her bed with her saying she's happy we're starting over." She flopped down and sat next to Marissa, quickly feeling cold when the brunette shifted away from her ever so slightly.

"So you're with her then? Like, in a relationship?" Alex watched as Marissa chewed on her bottom lip and her chest began to heave just a little bit as if she was holding something in. She didn't know what to do.

"No. I told her, after the last time, it wasn't going to be like that." _Crap. _Alex closed her eyes. Why was this big deal?

"How many times did you sleep with her, Alex?"

"Twice. You sound like a jealous girlfriend you know." The shorter girl smiled but the glare she got in response wasn't close to the happy girl she had left. "Are you okay?" She wanted desperately to know what was going through Marissa's mind right now.

"You don't deserve her. You're worth so much more; I don't want to see you hurt." Alex held back with dear life from saying _'Not being able to be with you hurts more than you know.' _Instead she let out a tight smile and brought Marissa into a lingering hug.

"I know. I'm lucky to have a friend like you." Without being able to see her Alex missed her hurt look that adorned Marissa's features and the tight smile that hid her eyes from tears.

"Yeah. I'll always be your friend." Alex rubbed her back and pulled away, ignoring the butterflies that were competing to swarm out of her stomach. She locked eyes with the brunette and though she tried she just couldn't pull away from her. She tried to read her through those ocean green eyes but she couldn't. The two leant in and it was Marissa's eyes that fluttered shut first, bringing Alex to her senses.

"I can't do this." The blonde whispered but Marissa didn't pay much attention to her and she knew it. "Marissa, please. I can't." She pulled away before the two lips came crashing down onto each other, she pushed herself to the other side of the couch leaving a very confused Newport girl behind.

"What's wrong?" Marissa scooted closer and Alex froze. "I thought you wanted this." Alex closed her eyes, her mind screaming this wasn't happening and her heart echoing just to kiss her and not look back. Blood rushed to her ears confusing her and drowning out Marissa's soft voice, her pleas washed over by all the commotion going on inside her mind. Finally she pried her eyes open and looked at the young girl sat next to her.

"I do, but I can't be your experiment when I like you so much. I've wanted this for so long but now that I'm so close to having it; it scares the shit out of me." There she admitted it. Marissa smiled gently brushed her knuckles along Alex's jaw, bringing her fingers to trace her lips and finally let her hand rest to cup her cheek. Temptation bled into the atmosphere and Alex had to remind herself that breathing wasn't all that difficult.

"And do you have any idea how I feel? You're a girl." She chuckled and brought her face just a little closer to Alex's. This time she didn't pull away. "It's easier to get over your fears when you do it with another person." That's all Alex heard before the lips she had dreamt about for weeks brought themselves down onto hers and the arms she had imagined would hold her now did.

Temptation could be a bitch but she loved being under it's spell.

_**Addicted. **_

She's looking at you like you have lost your mind and you probably have. You've been grinning like an idiot for the past twenty minutes and though she was inquisitive as to why before, now she's just being nosy. You tilt your head to the side, just a tiny bit and take in what is yours. She hasn't actually been yours for long, one week to be exact and it's almost to the hour that you had your first kiss. She probably dosen't even remember but you do, it changed your life and you can't really complain. You had money and friends but you hadn't found that happiness. Ryan tried, he really did, but he could never fill you fully. Now you giggle, that sounded dirty. She's looking at you and her eyebrow is raised and her eyes are squinting, she's beyond confused at your almost aphrodisiac like high and although she lets out a few laughs here and there at your state, she is fully oblivious she is the drug that fuels you.

According to the medical dictionary, which you have been reading for science after being forced to go back to school, the correct term for an addict is:

_"A person who has a craving for an addictive substance, who is physically or emotionally dependent on that substance on a daily basis."_

You make a little check-list in your mind just to make sure that you have the facts clear in your head.

Are you physically dependant on Alex? _Yes._

Are you emotionally dependant on Alex? _Yes. _

Is this dependency on a daily basis? _Hell Yes. _

You turn onto your side and your eyes instantly lock onto her bewildered ones. She is your natural high and there is no antidote. You could be forced to live without her and the side-effects would be devastating. Sometimes it's dangerous to have her all the time, there's the space issue and sometimes she likes to be alone to think. You give her that but you always go back to her and she always lets you, neither of you put up a fight because you need each other.

"What is up with you today? You're, like, on a high." You chuckle at the assumption and you wonder if she can actually read your mind. No, she probably couldn't. If she could you would have slept together by now with all the thoughts that swim in your mind. And hers. She had to practically tear herself away from you the other night, mumbling something about going slow and doing this relationship thing right. You smile again at the memory. She's too addicting to be real.

"I'm just happy." You say and lay your head back on her stomach as her fingers play with your hair. "You're dangerous, you know, Ms. Kelly." You sit up again and you know how she hates it when you fidget, but she likes you all the same so it's okay. Plus, she can never resist your pout.

"I am?" She's confused again but a glint in her eye tells you that she is amused by your behavior and as much as you are dependant on her; she feeds off of you.

"You could become very addictive to me." You push her back and move your body above hers, your arms on either side and your hair falling down to make a barrier to the outside world. She smirks and you cock an eyebrow.

"It's only addictive if you can't get enough of it." She's used your words from many weeks ago and the fire that was already burning inside of you spreads quickly and masks itself as a grin on your face. She knows she has used your words and the way she is biting her lip tells you that she is enjoying every minute of you not being able to have a comeback. You press your forehead into hers and your noses graze.

"Then, yeah, I'm addicted." You close the gap, and your eyes, relaxing into her. If she's your drug then you will happily sin.

**And that is where I finish this. What did you think? I'm not too sure about it actually but I'm not sure on how I can improve it. Review, if you want, and I'll try and get back to you. Also, if you want me to do another chapter like this you can send me some words in a review maybe, but I'm a bit tied down with college work and things at home but it will all be appreciated. **


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